What’s that smell?

Let’s read something I came across on the interwebz:

Christians love (agape) homosexuals. What this means is that we want the best for homosexuals. Christians treat homosexuals the same as they treat anyone else — wanting the best that can be had for everyone. However, that does not mean Christians accept homosexuality as being a good lifestyle. Homosexuality is a sin. God hates sin.

In other words, God hates homosexuals. Cmon, that is the only logical end to this line of thinking. Go on, try to see if you can come up with another one. Plus, what was that about Sodom and Gomorrah and how YHWH smote them? God clearly hates homosexuals.

Damn. I didn’t know our pollution problem extended to the interwebz. Holy shit, that stuff was poisonous. I don’t know whether to laugh or cry.

To deal with my complex emotions, I must write an open letter:

Dear Judeo-Christian God,

Please help other people keep their implied revulsion to themselves. Merci. However, if homosexuals are struck with the plague (or AIDS), I won’t complain because I trust you know what’s best. At least I think that’s how this god thing of yours works. Oh, just make sure those homosexuals do not live around me coz I do not want to catch the plague (or AIDS) by some sort of freak accident. I wanna live a long and full life or whatever. You know, all that stuff.

Also, please help other people understand that the Bible is an anthology of literature, selected, translated, edited, and compiled by people with a certain bias, and that, as we read everything else critically, so we should read the Bible. Merci beaucoup.

Oh, I’ve figured out what that smell was. It’s brimstone. You know, like when God destroyed … Never mind. If you didn’t catch the joke, don’t read it over or even just look back – you might get turned into a pillar of salt.

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